Saturday, January 9, 2010

Beware of Hatred

Beware of hatred, in all its levels. It will consume you, if subtly, and steal your life. I believe now that the reason I was so lifeless last semester was that I allowed my hatred of various aspects of USAFA and my frustration with being there to grow. Subtly, it began to consume me, and my capacity to feel and be sensitive was severely knocked back, replaced by bitter thoughts and sarcastic cynicism. I have a penchant for the pessimistic and I notice the negative first. But that doesn't sound too much like being joyful always, praying continually, and giving thanks in all circumstances.

It didn't make sense that a place could make inner life harder/near impossible. The antidote to death inside is to connect with God, the source of life. So that is my struggle, to learn to live moment by moment in His grace.

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